This question is possibly one of the most controversial ones you could ask anyone, and, as a result, it’s one that’s generally avoided. Unfortunately, men are typically seen as the aggressors, not females. In addition, society prefers not to associate the feminine gender with violence or those requiring the use of physical force in retaliation.
But can you defend yourself against a woman? Yes, your constitutional right to the ‘security of person says you have the right to defend yourself in harmful situations such as domestic violence, assault, and battery. This protection is not limited to gender, ethnicity, or race. However, certain factors govern what qualifies as self-defense.
It may seem alien to contemplate defending yourself against a woman, especially as you only have to do a quick search on the internet to see that violence against women is higher than against men. Furthermore, women are usually seen as nurturing, kind, gentle creatures, so why would you need to defend yourself against them? Sadly this isn’t always the case.
Are Women Always The Victim?
And as fictitious as this may seem, women, are not always victims in violent situations. Although not often spoken about, men can also be victims of domestic violence and fear for their safety. According to a study on gender-based violence against men in India,” 52.4% experienced physical violence (slapping, punching, choking) at the hands of a spouse or partner at least once in their relationship.
Closer to home, US statistics show that one in nine men suffers severe domestic violence from an intimate partner.
You’re probably snickering at this point, and you wouldn’t be alone. Many people find it laughable that a man could be beaten or abused by his female counterpart. But unfortunately, this happens a lot because men are less likely to defend themselves or step forward and admit to being victimized. Usually, this is because they are embarrassed and fear subsequent ridicule or that the authorities won’t believe them.
Defense VS Violence
Most men will confirm that growing up, they were taught never to hit a woman, and as a result, most never dream of resorting to physical conflict with females. However, when talking about defense, it is totally different from reactive and reciprocated violence.
Defending yourself involves taking certain actions to protect or resist an attack; it should not be interpreted as a reason to react in an equally violent or abusive manner.
That said, when someone (female or otherwise) threatens you with violence, you do have the right to defend yourself until that danger has passed.
Elements That Justify Self Defense
While we all have the right to defend ourselves from physical violence, there are certain factors to consider before taking preventive action. Let’s be frank, being forced to take action and protect yourself from a woman isn’t easy, but facing legal action because you didn’t understand the law only adds to the stress of the situation.
Below are the guidelines for justified self-defense.
- You believed you were in direct danger of injury or of being touched unlawfully
- Immediate use of force was required to protect yourself
- You didn’t use excessive force (more than necessary) to defend yourself
Please note that certain states have ‘duty to retreat laws.’ This means your right to self-defense is not protected if you had the opportunity to retreat to a place of safety.
Non Violent Defense Tactics
Using non-violent, self-defense tactics is far better than resorting to physical violence in retaliation. It’s also an excellent way of ensuring you avoid injury or aggravating the situation to a dangerous level. This is true for all self-defense scenarios, not only when defending yourself from a woman.
- The voice of reason
Try to resolve the issue by speaking calmly to the other person. Often conflict can be defused by discussing the matter in a reasonable manner. Keep a lid on your emotions and prevent your anger from taking control. Instead, try to use humor to prevent things from escalating.
As the victim of a physical attack, it may be difficult to accept that sometimes ‘your reaction’ is the match that lights the proverbial flame. Therefore, be careful and mindful of your words and actions, as sometimes arguments can inadvertently be started and blown out of proportion due to a simple misunderstanding.
- Choose The Sensible Path
Everyone knows that it takes two to argue or fight. Of course, there are occasions where unprovoked physical violence occurs, but for this purpose, we are talking about trading physical blows or verbal insults. These scenarios can quickly escalate out of control and become dangerous.
If neither party is prepared to listen or be reasonable, sometimes the best choice is to walk away. Taking a step back allows the person to have some ‘breathing space’ and provides them with time to calm down and think clearly. No one thinks clearly when blinded by anger or rage.
Then once tempers have cooled, resume the conversation to try and resolve the issue calmly.
- Be Prepared
Unfortunately, some conflicts cannot be resolved in a non-violent manner, no matter how hard you try to calm the situation, which is why you should always be prepared. First, have an escape plan in mind; this could be as simple as ensuring you are standing closest to the door so you can exit quickly if needed.
If this is not possible, ensure there is enough space between you and your attacker to allow you to take evasive action if required. Finally, if you have to defend yourself, remember that according to the law, the force you use to protect yourself should not be excessive or more than is reasonably required to prevent an attack.
The Final Punch Line
Finding yourself in a volatile situation where you feel the need to defend or protect yourself is never pleasant. And when your attacker is a woman, this can make things even harder. But remember, when it comes to your safety, you have the right to defend yourself with reasonable force no matter what gender your attacker may turn out to be!
